Open up to her so that she’ll NEVER feel attraction for you again. Or, instead, shut the f*ck up!
Q: I’ve known this girl for about 4 months now.
I asked her out after about a month of knowing her (didn’t really know her THAT well at the time) and she said she just wanted to be friends.
We slowly hung out less after that for about a month but over the last month we’ve basically been inseparable. We have dinner together a lot and we spend a lot of time together even if it’s just doing nothing. I haven’t gone a day without seeing her for so long I can’t remember. We spend more time together than my friends spend with their steady girl friends.
We have these awesome conversations when we’re together at dinner (3 hours+) and it seems like we’re never short of conversation. Lately the conversations have gotten a lot deeper. We’ve talked about past relationships, the future, what we’re looking for in a bf/gf, etc. I feel an awesome connection with this girl. It’s like we just get each other. I don’t feel like there’s any pressure to impress.
Everything is just comfortable and easy.
I want to tell her that I really like her but I’m worried about losing what’s become a really great friend at the same time.
Should I just tell or should I let things play out? I’ve already put myself out there once so I don’t know if I should do it again or not. But now we have this great connection that wasn’t there the first time.
I can’t stop thinking about her and I feel like not telling her is driving me crazy.
What should I do?
A: Holy crap don’t be stupid!
NOOOOOOOOOO!
Is it too late? Did you scare the girl away yet? I hope there’s time to save this disaster…
First, learn something about ATTRACTION ( link )
Women respond to who you’re BEING, not what you’re saying. So stop thinking, and start feeling.
I understand what’s happening… you’re feeling insecure, and nervous, and tense. This is because you THINK she feels the same way, and you THINK that talking about things will ease the tension. The problem is that TENSION is ATTRACTION. As soon as you try using LOGIC with her you’ll f*** it all up.
She doesn’t care what you THINK. She only cares what she FEELS.
Pay attention and read the above line again, because this is no joke.
When it comes to “getting the girl” it’s ALL about how she FEELS. If you screw things up with TALKING she’ll stop feeling uncertain and attracted, and she’ll start feeling bored and unattracted.
If you spill your guts she’ll feel that you’re not the kind of man she can lean up simply because you’re not even man enough to handle a little uncertainty.
I speak from experience. I’ve made that mistake. It’s what lame guys do to feel better. Don’t do it.
Instead read this and follow my advice carefully – link
It’s not about talking with her, it’s about BEING with her. Take the actions I describe in my above link and she’ll either crumble at your feet, or become even closer friends with you.
Best of luck man!
~ Robby
Today’s AWESOME thumbnail is by this AWESOME photographer.
4 Responses
Hahaha,
think back rob, doesn’t this sound like you having a deja vú?
Comes pretty closes to my situation ^^
Ha! You’re so right! Thankfully you’ve come a long way!
Hey Rob,
How You know when its just simply TOO late. And you know she’ll never feel attraction for you again??
Hey Jon,
That’s a great question… the truth is that once a girl has an impression of you (usually in the first few minutes of chatting) its tough to convince her otherwise. Pay attention to her body language and her behaviour. If she avoids you, leans away from you, and other wise seems to be annoyed by you, then it’s time to move on.
The fastest way to turn her around is to lean back yourself, stop doing any aggressive perusing, and step up your “attraction.”
Read this: http://www.fullofhateandreadytodate.com/blog/how-to-create-attraction-in-a-woman/
In most cases I suggest you spent more time meeting new women who aren’t already going out of their way avoiding you. It’s a better way of spending your energy.