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QUESTION:

I recently joined a volleyball team and got picked up by a random team where I knew no one. At our first game we had one girl that I found attractive, but turns out she was just a sub for that one game.

I thought she was funny and very attractive but I was trying to figure out if she might be a boyfriend on our team and ended up waiting to long and never trying to ask her out or get her number. Well she is friends with the guy who recruited me and I found her on facebook under his friends list since I remembered her name.

My question is how should I proceed? Should I just send her a fun message and try to get her number/ask her out. Or at this point is it over and would just seem creepy? I figure I’ve got nothing to lose and only a shot at a date to gain so I’m leaning for just sending a message and seeing what happens. If you agree any tips on the message I should send? I’ve never tried just getting a date from someone using facebook, etc so I’m just a little unsure on if this is crossing any lines.

If it matters I’m 24 and she is near the same since she is done with college too.

Thanks for taking the time to read this,

J.K.
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ANSWER:

Thanks for the email.

Hmmmmm……

The world of facebook is a strange place indeed. Pickup through facebook was much easier a few years ago, but today many women have their walls up.

If I were you I’d simply ask the dude who got her on the team if she’s single, and if she’d be your type.

Perhaps he can be the link between you and her. She’d likely be far more receptive if he introduced you again.

If all else fails then facebook away. It’s like you said, what’s the worst that could happen? She says nothing?

What’s a good opener? You can approached it two ways. You can be flirty and fun, or you can be more direct.

Maybe something like this, “Hey Shannon, I got your name from Dave after I met you at Volleyball last week. He mentioned that you were super fun, smart, and sometimes hilarious. Is there any truth to these rumors? ;) “

Or maybe something like, “Hey Shannon, I got your name from Dave after I met you at Volleyball last week. You ran away after the game before I had time to use my ninja flirting skills to steal your name and number. 😉 Will I see you at another game any time soon?”

Or maybe something like, “Hey Shannon, I got your name from Dave after I met you at Volleyball last week. You ran away after the game before I had time to embarrass myself trying to flirt while trying to get your number. 😉 Will I see you at another game any time soon?”

Or maybe something like, “Hey Shannon, I got your name from Dave after I met you at Volleyball last week. He mentioned you might not be coming to any more games and I haven’t yet had a chance to embarrass myself trying to flirt. Are you really not coming to any more games? ~ Jeremy (the cute tall dude who kept making awkward eye contact with you)”

Hopefully this gives you enough to dream up something that works for you.

Take it sleazy,
~ Robby

P.S. When in doubt, read this book to help you facebook her into your life.

P.P.S. Today’s top thumbnail photo was from this amazing photographer.