QUESTION:

My boyfriend said, “you’re the best girlfriend I ever had.” I didn’t really know what to say or rather to believe it or not because it was after sex and I thought he’s just saying things. He also told me he loved me for the first time (before I said it) after sex.

We’ve been together for 3 months and friends for 2 years. We were watching a movie and he accidently called me his wife. I just laughed it off.

ANSWER:

It sounds like you really want to believe him but that you’re hesitant because perhaps you’ll later be hurt if it’s not true?

First of all – yes, after 3 months together it’s pretty logical to accept what he’s saying as truth. If you still don’t trust the things he’s saying then that’s definitely something you need to work out together asap! Three months is plenty of time to get a feel for someone’s level of honesty.

But there is also power in ignoring what he thinks of you. Whether it’s good or bad. Basically I suggest you do something radical and teach yourself to never take anything personally.

I promise it’ll leave you more happy and less stressed about what people think and say about you.

The challenge in trying to “not take things personally” is trying to not take compliments personally. Obviously it’s beneficial to ignore peoples insults, even if they are coming from loved ones. But ignoring someones compliments is much tougher.

But if you accept someone’s opinion of you, good or bad, then you’re always going to be at the mercy of other peoples opinions. And it sucks.

But when you practice “not taking things personally” life becomes much easier and it frees you from trying to please everyone. And it allows you the ability to not worry if something they’re saying is true or not. Because ultimately what they’re saying doesn’t really matter.

For example… does it even matter if you’re really his best girlfriend or not?

No. All that matters is that he treats you with love and respect, and that you already love yourself so much that you won’t accept anything less. All his opinions shouldn’t influence what you think of yourself because you’re the only person who REALLY knows if you’re awesome, or terrible.

I’m rambling.

Basically, it doesn’t matter what he thinks. It only matters what you think. And, of course, how he treats you.

😀

~ Robby

 

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